Gratitude Posts - Friendships

Rebecca

Rebecca is my oldest friend, we met in school when we were both wearing black mini skirts and she was wearing black lipstick - can you imagine? We were both artsy-theater types in a world of rational and solid folks, so we globbed onto each other. Through many years and various phases we have been tender with each other and tried to outdo each other in embarrassing the other in public! She usually wins. I cry uncle faster than she does!

Rebecca is busy with 3 active and engaging daughters. We live in separate states. But when I think of her, my heart gets all mushy.

I am thankful for Rebecca!

Gratitude Posts - Friendships

Jennifer

Jennifer calls herself a "singing survivor", and that title suits her well. We got to know each other through my friends who both lived with her and loved her music. I remember seeking her performances out in such offbeat venues as Higley's in La Canada. So when I was finally, as an event producer, able to hire musicians, she was on my short list.We had 2 summers to get to know each other better through her playing once a week in the cool of the July and August evenings in the Gardens. And we shared about personal topics and challenges and dreams.

When my beloved passed away I had 2 songs that rattled around in my head for the memorial service and I could hear Jennifer singing them. I was so raw, I did not know if it was rude of me to ask her to perform at his service or not. Sheepishly, I asked her if she would be willing to learn these songs... and she said YES. She blessed me in one of my darkest moments.

Now she is living farther away and has many challenges, but she still is singing and bringing light with her wherever she goes. You can check her out HERE.

I am thankful for Jennifer.

Love,

Gratitude Posts - Friendships

"China"

"China" is a beautiful friend. We met online first, in a young widow's group, and the connections were real and substantial through the wires. When I visited the south for an extended period of time I got to meet her in person. We met at an Ikea, figuring that if the friend chemistry was not good we could shop and go our separate ways at the end. But we spent the entire rest of the day together and even stayed overnight at a hotel just so that we could keep talking later into the evening.

"China" is a feisty, funny and faithful woman. She lost her beloved partner at a young age, as I had. She is forever spiritually curious like I am. And she has a big heart for the underdog, like I do. She is a non-profit diva - just like me. Read about her ministry HERE. Apart from similarities, her car is covered in funny bumper stickers and she wears bright and colorful clothes that betray her enthusiasm for living large.

I am thankful for "China".

Love,

Gratitude Posts - Friendships

When I lost my soul mate to cancer in 2008 there was certainly no way that I could have understood the way my relationships would change over time.

I experienced such acute loneliness from losing my flesh-and-blood connection with Brian. It was akin to having my chest ripped open and all the contents, hot, sticky and precious bursting forth.

Who or what got me through?

Truth is, the question is really wrong unless it is in the present tense. Who or what is GETTING me through. These kinds of processes are life long. No one seems better qualified to tell you this than I. Our processes of grief are such a spiral, not a linear path.

I think WHO is far more important to me than what. I was just reading about the effects of loneliness on our bodies and psyches and it is sobering to understand how much a toll it takes to be without friendship. That is an important part of what my work and calling is about - because grief is a culturally isolating experience. Most people find that a month after a death that their phones stop ringing... people vanish months later when you are really in the sh*tter. The endurance that the long road of grief takes is pretty misunderstood by our culture - where the message is "get over it".

So I celebrate 2 people today in this post... one "old" and one "new"...

WHO - OLD

Samantha






My friend in all things adventurous. We have known each other since the early 90's. Our sense of humor is terse and wacky. She has been so faithful for so many years. We currently are working together intently on a project in Haiti. Post earthquake, things have ramped up as we are trying to fund raise to move the kids to a safe place before the rains come... read about our work HERE. We named the site little iron flowers after a poem which said the beauty of the Haitian people was like little iron flowers.... I think grieving people are like this too - beautiful and tough.

Sam knew after Brian died that I needed counseling for post-traumatic stress and she gave me a platform through which to do it. It was like throwing me a life preserver.

Samantha is moving into manifesting the full measure of her creation. I love being a witness and participant in this.

WHO - NEW

Kathryn Antyr

Katheryn goes by the nickname Collage Diva. I have read her for about half a year now. She is actively sharing her life-source of creativity on her site HERE. I read her, listen to her, enjoy her and find myself on a virtual oxygen machine. I have been a silent observer for a good while and consistently find a good nugget of nourishment in her creative outpouring on her website. Go check her out...

I think I will continue to share along this line for a few days... I am making these posts as tiny, humble "gratitude visits"...


Those with poet mind
will love you quiet and deep
like haiku


Love,